Conversations and how you make other people feel

Hey there, gorgeous,

I wanted to talk to you about conversations and the different kind of conversations that we can have. I recently heard a story and I wanted to share it with you. 

It’s about a lady – let’s call her Sue. Sue goes to an event and at this event she speaks with two incredibly influential leaders. These people are at the top of their game, highly esteemed, well known and respected experts in their field. Afterwards she is asked how her experience was talking with these two leaders. 

Sue explains that the first leader – let’s call her Bridgette. Bridgette just oozed confidence and was clearly extremely knowledgeable, very intelligent and just amazing. Sue said you could tell without a shadow of doubt that Bridgette was an incredible woman who owned her game. Bridgette was brilliant at what she did and Sue could really feel that. 

The second leader that Sue spoke to – let’s call her Hayley. Sue said that Hayley was amazing and incredible and made Sue feel like she was the most amazing and incredible person. 

I just want you to sit with that. 

Bridgette made Sue feel like Bridgette was one of the most incredible leaders. Hayley made Sue feel like Sue was the most amazing, incredible person. 

PLEASE NOTE: There is nothing wrong with either leader, it just all depends what type of conversations you want to be having and what kind of connections you want to foster.  It is just worth noting the difference. Especially if you are a coach or in any kind of helping profession, our second leader Hayley allowed Sue to share her life and provided the space so Sue could let herself shine and be seen and heard. 

Hayley was just listening to Sue and creating an open environment, being present and building rapport for Sue to open up and share that light, share her fire, her passions, whatever it was that Sue wanted to share. 

That’s such a gift that we can give, to fully turn up for someone and be present and genuinely interested and curious and hold space for them to show you their true self. To be part of that kind of conversation is always uplifting and incredibly powerful for both parties. The person being seen and heard and the person bearing witness.  

They walk away feeling alive, cells and neurons firing and fizzing away, it really impacts us on a deep level. What a gift that is that we can give. I wonder if all of us were to try this on for size, how that would be. Whether you are a coach and you’re wanting to have deep transformational conversations with people so that they can walk away feeling heard in a way that they don’t in their every day life, or whether you’re simply going down to your local cafe and ordering a coffee and you truly allow yourself to connect with that person by just listening and being interested in them. 

Those tiny little moments can make a real difference. They create connection and as humans we all crave, want and need connection. 

As already mentioned, I am not saying there’s no place for our first leader – Bridgette. There are situations in life where we need to be the leader that shares our own personal strengths, knowledge and insights and lets people know all of this with clarity, confidence and conviction. 

There’s definitely a place for this but I’d really love to invite you to start to play with a harmony of both. 

Of being able to share your strengths and gifts but also being an incredible listener with presence and not focusing on what you need to say or do next or how the story relates to you, but really being present for that person. Letting them shine for that moment, encouraging their passions and encouraging them to just be themselves and allow them the space to be all that they are, just as they are. 

That’s amazing. That’s such a gift. That is so uplifting. That’s what I wanted to share with you today. I’d  love to start a movement of us bringing in a deeper connection with one another. That’s everything from me today, my darlings. 

Yours in presence and real connections from my gorgeous clients to my coffee guy and all in between and surrounding. 

Love Jojo X x