Are you paralysed by the voice inside your head? 

Oh my God, you are so frigging STUPID! 

I cannot BELIEVE you said that! 

Do you know how dumb you looked just then? 

Do you know how fat and ugly you look compared to those other girls? 

Seriously, could you BE any more socially awkward? 

Friends, I’d like to introduce you to the voice inside my head. 

These are some of the things she says to me. On a regular basis. Not so nice, huh?! 


In the past, these sorts of comments and fears would have sent me reeling. I would have hidden away from the world, cancelled on that catch up with a friend, said no to awesome opportunities and fun events, and stayed oh so small and oh so safe. 

But since I’ve learned more about that little voice, and her role in my life, I’ve gotten a whole lot better at dealing with her. 

If all those nasty comments up there sound way too familiar, this is for you angel… 

What is the voice inside your head? 

It is our ego, our mean girl, our inner critic. Whatever you want to call it, we all have one darling, I promise you that you are not alone with this. 

If it’s so nasty, why do we have an ego? 

Our mean girl is there to keep us safe and protect us. It keeps us in our safe little bubble so we don’t get hurt. This can be great but it can also keep us stuck, living and playing small. Scared to step out and stuck in fear. 

How does our ego keep us stuck and small? 

It convinces us that things are scary; that there is something to be afraid of. It really prevents you living up to your highest potential. 

So what the hell can we do about it?!! 

Becoming aware is the first step. I always tell my beautiful clients to start to listen to their first and second voice. You will notice that your heart speaks first and your mean girl chimes right in second. 

For example – 

‘I think I’d like to try and run 5 kms by the end of the year.’ (Heart) 

‘Don’t be stupid, you couldn’t do that! You wouldn’t stick to the program, just like last time.’ (Mean Girl) 

The trick here is bringing awareness to both voices and getting to know both. If you are new to this, then your first voice may be a slight little whisper, but start to catch it. It’s there. And what you want to do in time is turn up the first voice and turn down the second voice. (“Thanks but no thanks, Mean Girl. I can do this.”) 

This is a topic that affects so many of us, so I’m going to be diving into it in more detail in the coming weeks (so stay tuned!). For now, I’d love to hear from you: how do you struggle with the nasty mean voice inside your head? How does it keep you playing small? And what actions do you take to overcome it? 

Thanks so much for sharing so openly.

You guys rock my world. 

Love Jo Xx